Posts

Showing posts from September, 2013

How to work with someone when he won't work with you

Image
"The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting." Sun Tzu, The Art of War My co-worker Bobbie* refused to talk to me unless she absolutely had to, so I made a point every day to make sure she had to talk to me. We shared an office and I thought her tenacity in refusing to acknowledge me was inspiring. It wasn't that she was a quiet, reticent personality. Whenever a family member or friend came by the office she could chat cheerfully for 20 minutes at a time. So, as a challenge to myself, I made a point to always speak cheerfully to Bobbie and ask her how she was. She begrudgingly answered my cordialities but her demeanor made me think I had forced her to drink vinegar.  There were days, however, when I just couldn't be cheerful any more and I would try to play the game by her rules and not speak to her, either. Typically, I caved by the first morning break and asked "how are you doing, Bobbie?"  So, what did I do, you may ask, to

45 Minutes And Out

Image
Have you ever wondered why your therapist behaves the way she does? Here are some possible reasons, based on their training and experience. (Please be warned that some answers may be humorous because laughing is good therapy.) Q. I've thought about going to mental health therapy. How do I know if I'm a good candidate. A. Take your pulse. Is it still beating? If yes, then you are a good candidate for therapy. But you're a more likely candidate if you have recently gone through a major life change, such as birth of a child, job change, death of a loved one. But all people can benefit from having an objective person who has unconditional positive regard for them in their lives.  Q.  No matter what I tell my therapist, she always looks at me with a neutral face. Doesn't she have any emotions? A. Your therapist has plenty of emotions and she manages her emotions in a professional way during your session, so you have a safe space to express yours. She maintains